Archive | February, 2012


19 Feb

this is me, the beautiful non-ninge-eating me.

actually i love the me who eat healthily, i simply hate that monster who controlled me to binge until i suffer. i really hate her.


hi-pro diet

19 Feb

i used grape wine vinegar and thyme leaves to oven bake them and one fillet cost me only 60kcal!!! but this snack is a bit too chewy for me, i like instant oats more.

see the inside!!!actually a bit tastier than i imagine!!!

i also cooked quinoa for dinner, i like that nutty taste SOOOOOOOOOOOO much!!! plus that i add in a lot of carrot, onion, mushroom and stalk of broccoli, this dish is super healthy in my binge everyday diet!!!

i binge everyday

19 Feb

I ate three packs of these 100g dolfin chocolate per day. i know this actually counts as a binge, but it just stop my other binges and i felt that this is more worth for me to get fat than those food i actually hate the taste but simply to fulfill the binge heart.

and days without chocolate will be binge eating instant oats with like three packs at midnight. it used to that when i can’t go down to supermarket and buy chocolate for myself, somehow these are healthier than the sugary cereals i used to binge.

the situation will be eating six of these…brown rice tortilla with zero toppings—i eat them plain because my binge brain is gonna crazy.


questions again

17 Feb

i’m actually supposed NOT to do this…but my mom was soooooooooo late for dinner with me that i’m now sooooooooooooooo hungry that i found these questions that should be answered by laura from keeping healthy getting stylish. here are the


  1.  Almond Butter or Peanut Butter? i actually hate peanut butter as having a anorexia history…with not even trying it. then during recovery, i learnt almond butter from fellow bloggers and ate nearly twenty jars. and i realized that i’m wasting too much money on food so i spread my grandmother’s cheaper priced peanut butter on my carob protein muffin from time to time. i actually not quite enjoy the taste of peanut butter than almond ones. also with the nutritional factor.
  2.  What made you smile today? i do went to gym so i was quite happy with that, haha, and i ate three 100g of chocolate bars, add to 300g, made me happy right? nope, it was a crazy binge.
  3.  What’s the last thing you do before falling asleep? reading a book about diet. ya, ALL about losing weight.
  4.  Treadmill or elliptical? treadmill, i do make 15% everytime i went to the gym.
  5.  Favorite piece of jewelry? no, i hate that, my mom works selling jewelry, and yes, i actually too hate my mom.
  6.  First thing (not a person or pet) you’d save if your house was on fire?  of course my wallet, do u? um…if money is no more important for me it’ll be the box of instant oatmeal because i’ve finished up my pack of bear naked high protein granola. but it’s ok, i’ll go buy a new pack tomorrow.
  7.  If you have a smartphone, what’s your most-used app? i think is that hitting the cat’s stomach, i like that sound it produced when it’s hurt.
  8.  Which of your family members are you closest to? no one i think. because of my hospitalization, i a;lready lose all my trust in them, no matter what they do now will not change the fact that i hate them deep in my heart. though i treat them as my dearest sweet heart now…somehow i can’t act my hate to them out that clearly, huh?!
  9. Would you rather shave your head or get a tattoo of a baby elephant on your leg? oh, oh, oh…i was shocked. of course tattoo…it’s just a short period of pain but shave is a long term self esteem pain until my hair grows back to normal, i like long hair girls, hehe maybe long hair man too~! just joking:)
  10. If you work out, what time is ideal for you? morning, afternoon, before dinner, or even right before sleep. actually the truth is after my binge, running now is still actually a after-act of my binge eating. no help right? and no hope too, i know.
  11. Sweet or savory? both ok? like sea salt in caramel chocolate. haha, if i must choose one, sweet of course, i rarely eat a anything savory in my day. oh my dinner comes, so i’ll off for eating, bye~!:D

ideal me

16 Feb

and these add to make BEATRICE~!:D

too fast

15 Feb

After watching a video from youtube, I decide to prepare meals in the fridge so I’ll not again fell into the trap of eating oily food cooked be my maid.

Then I can’t actually resist to make a small size salad to eat immediately!!!

And as I was separating all the things into different bowls, I roasted 320g brussel sprouts for the salads, but then they turned out all into my stomach! Not even one survive to live in my salads…so funny!

protein bear!

15 Feb

Today father brought home a lot of snacks from japan. As the cookies are with lots of flour—gluten, i can’t have them so i picked some red bean desserts for myself.

Others will be all for brother and his girlfriend.

I also ate this little chick, but didn’t go to the gym today, so sad.

Another day, I had lots of energy so i went to supermarket, and bought a lot of on sale soy made yogurt.

They tasted so good that i finished three pots at a time, soooooooo delicious!!!

And I also chose a new choice of bear naked granola which I used to buy. This pack was a high protein one which have 6g proteins in one serving, but as I ate the whole pack in a day so i ate 66g protein only from this in this day!!!Wow!!!